I have a photo of a sunrise on my bookshelf. Just a basic 4×6 image in a frame. But this sunrise means more to me than other time I’ve seen the sun come up.
About 16 years ago I surrounded myself with people and things I couldn’t resist. Honestly, I didn’t even try to resist. I went in knowing exactly what would happen.
So in the early morning hours…I got in my car and headed home overflowing with guilt and shame.
Here I was saved, baptized, Holy Spirit filled…and in one night I threw it all away and did everything I swore I would NEVER do again.
I was ashamed, and felt like a worthless human, and then I drove around a corner to this sunrise…
I pulled to the side of the road, and sobbed. And sobbed. Full scale ugly cry.
With tears still streaming, I took this photo with a disposable camera to remember this moment.
In the instant I saw this sunrise, I heard God’s voice tell me He loved me .
In that moment I understood grace for the first time.
In that moment something changed in my mindset about mistakes, sin, and bad behavior. God was against sin and bad behavior because it hurt ME. It affected ME. It broke ME. He hated what sin did to His daughter.
He did not hate me because I screwed up/sinned/made mistakes.
He had not stopped loving me because I “backslid.”
Me He loved.
Sin He hated.
This was a life changer for me.
Point to ponder while you wander…
This sunrise image reminds me that His grace covers my mistakes, as I grow into who He made me to be.
His grace empowers me to do things I could never do alone.
Today I can do things with Jesus I could never do by myself. Even if I blow it and screw up today, I am loved.