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Fun Fact Friday: Wait

Fun Fact… Did you know that wait in the Old Testament is defined as: to bind like a rope; be strong with endurance; to expect/to hope in God.

Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!” Psalm 27:14 NKJV

This verse is not David pointing his finger at you accusingly and commanding you not to move, despite using the word twice.

He’s encouraging you to spend time with God, let him prepare and strengthen you so that when the time comes, you’ll be ready.

David was anointed king as a kid, but he did not go around telling everyone he was King Saul’s replacement. He did not kill King Saul, despite Saul trying to kill him and having opportunity to do so, to take his place as King.

Instead, he partnered with God and prepared in the secret place, and waited WITH God.

This is the same verse in the Passion Translation:

Heres what I learned through it all: Don’t give up, don’t be impatient, Be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave, courageous, and never lose hope. Yes keep on waiting For He will never disappoint you!

Point to ponder while you wander…Waiting is more about having expectation in & partnering with God than timing. Waiting is about hope.

Musical Monday…a bit of a twinge…

Let me start by saying that I enjoy my life. It’s a good life. And I mean that truthfully snd sincerely. God has blessed me and I am grateful.

Job I like going to everyday. 👍

Great apartment. 👍 

Amazing Friends. ❤

Best Nieces and Nephews In The World.❤

Health. 👍

I have a lot to be thankful for but there are times when seeing happy couples causes a twinge type ache in my chest. Actual physical pain. Kinda like this song… 

   Someone Else’s Star

Feelings are feelings. You should feel your feelings. They are valid. But your feelings are not reliable truth to live by. They change. Often. Continually. They are fickle.

I feel my feelings. I acknowledge them. But I don’t life by them. Do I want a partner in my life? Yes. Yes, I do. But I will not sit on a shelf and not live the good life I have now because I am single.

Point to ponder while you wander…”I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content:  I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:11-13

Hope is a Perspective Shift

When hope’s dream seems to drag on and on, the delay can be depressing. But when at last your dream comes true, life’s sweetness will satisfy your soul.” Proverbs 13:12 TPT

This verse… Oh man. This verse…

The first part has been my truth for many years now. Fighting to keep believing. Seeking Jesus. Worshipping in the darkest parts of depression, when I’d rather stay in bed and sleep my life away. Or escape to a place I’d rather be in movies or books.

I even painted the first part of the verse in the ugliest manner possible…

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About a year and and some months later God encouraged me to paint the second half of the verse. I used the exact same colors.

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Looks totally different, doesn’t it? Perspective matters. What you believe becomes reality.

Remind yourself daily that God is for you not against you. Remind yourself you are unconditionally loved. Remind yourself that God is working things out for good for those who love Him.

Because, let’s be honest, the world can be an asshole who sucks the joy and peace right out of you.

Point to ponder while you wander…Not all dreams come true when we are young, so don’t let the frustrations of the day to day steal your joy. Keep dreaming. Keep believing.

Seasons

One of my favorite verses on seasons is this one: “The season has changed, the bondage of your barren winter has ended, and the season of hiding is over and gone. The rains have soaked the earth and left it bright with blossoming flowers.” Song of Songs 2:11-12 TPT

It is full of hope that the long believed for promises of God will come to pass soon. I have some of those promises. I know it’s the season for some of them to come to pass with all that I am. But I can’t see them, YET.

So I was thinking about this verse because today is April 10th, and this is what it looks like in my yard right now…

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Seasons. Sigh. Just when you think winter has passed and you have moved forward into spring…it snows. For days. And the wind blows. And the temperature stays at a frosty 29 degrees….rather than the 60 degrees it should be in the beginning of April.

What’s my point? Well it’s certainly not to complain about the weather!

When we get close to a promise being fulfilled or achieving a goal, that’s sometimes the hardest time of the waiting period. Many people give up right before their breakthroughs simply because it snows in April.

When hope’s dream seems to drag on and on, the delay can be depressing. But when at last your dream comes true, life’s sweetness will satisfy your soul.” Proverbs 13:12 TPT

Point to ponder while you wander…”The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground to water the earth. They cause the grain to grow, producing seed for the farmer and bread for the hungry. It is the same with My Word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and will prosper everywhere I send it.” Isaiah 55:10-11 NLT

The very snow causing you to want to quit, may very well be the snow sent to water the seed. In other words, that irritating circumstance, sad event, trouble, job loss, etc, may be the very thing that positions you for promotions, increase and promises fulfilled.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love.” Romans 5:5-6 NLY

David Had to Wait Too

David was a just a 15 year old kid just being who he was in the middle of nowhere.

Then SUDDENLY he is anointed king over Israel.

Sweet! Overnight success! Well…not exactly…David had to wait 15 years until he was actually made king.

Seven of those years he served the palace of the current king, who was insane, hated him, and tried repeatedly to kill him.The next eight weren’t any better, fighting battles and sleeping in caves.

But how David handled the waiting is what makes me respect him. He vented his emotions and sought God to deliver him from the harrowing and desperate situations he repeatedly found himself in. But he didn’t blame God or threaten to quit or beg to be returned to the safety of his former life. (I say this because I am guilty of blaming God and asking Him to just give me an easier life.)

David always ended his rants with, but I know You are a merciful and gracious God. I know that You are wiser than me, so I hope in You. I trust in You.  So I will endure. I will wait on you.

And He did wait. 15 long and trying years. But after those long years of preparation and learning, David became king. And among his descendants was the One who would save the world.

So waiting sucks…believe me I know it does…but God keeps His Word. He honors His promises. He will do what He said He would do. And that promise isn’t just for you bet for those who come after you.

So hang on. Keep believing. Keep trusting Him.

Point to ponder while you wander…God’s timing isn’t always fast. But He always keeps His Word. So on that journey it is okay to vent and rant TO God about the circumstances along the way. But don’t forget to end your rant with the truth: He is faithful and wise. He is good and kind. He loves you.

Real Power

“Oh!  May the God of hope fill you up with joy, fill you up with peace, so that your believing lives, filled with the life-giving energy of the Holy Spirit, will brim over with hope.”  Romans 15:13 MSG

This verse may sound light and fluffy.  But it isn’t.  This verse is about real power.

Joy here is not happiness from external circumstances, but an inward calm delight that overflows into exceeding joy.  Maintaining joy in the midst of turmoil and trials is how you are strengthened to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Peace here is not absence of conflict but rather peace in spite of conflict.  This peace allows you to prosper no matter the circumstances.  It gives you clarity in chaos.  It prevents you from making choices out of anger and emotion.

Hope is about anticipation with pleasure attached to it.  It’s about the expectation of good.  God is the God of anticipation of good.  He’s looking forward to filling you with joy.  He’s looking forward to filling you with peace.  Will you let Him?  Will you receive it?

He is awaiting with pleasure the day you understand the power you have at your disposal and begin to walk in it. God wants to see you prosper as your soul prospers.  This begins with receiving and learning to walk in joy and peace, with an expectation of good.  That is true power right there.

 

 

Waiting As Worship

“But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more.” Psalm 71:14 NIV

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the faith walk is not for sissies. Waiting can be boring, annoying, frustrating, painful, sad, and on and on. Essentially waiting sucks.

But!! I know that God knows more than I do. I know that His timing is stop on a dime perfect. I know God is faithful. I know He always keeps His word. I know these things in both my heart and my mind, because I’ve experienced them in my relationship with God.

I have hard days where I want to complain too. I really do understand. But I’ve learned that complaining doesn’t really do me any good. So I’ve started using my words to praise Him for what He’s doing and thanking Him for what He’s promised as though I already have it. This turns my waiting from frustrating into worshipping!!

Waste of Life

After yesterday’s rant about identity and waiting for the best, I have to share this link a friend posted. It’s about how girls get told “wait” and how frustrating that is when you get into your late 20s and into your 30s. Click Here for the link..

I agree with what she says about living our lives and not sitting and waiting for a spouse to complete us. I hit that point she’s talking about a long while ago. I would like a husband, but I’m not going to put my life on hold until I get one. I think that’s a waste of life.

I have friends who are living full out like me, but I also know some guys and gals who are crying and pleading with God for a spouse. It’s their sole focus. They think it will fix everything. I disagree. Having a relationship, same as having money, doesn’t create instant happiness. Is it nice to have? Yes. But is it a cure all? No.

If you are miserable single, you’ll be miserable in a relationship.

If you are full of joy single, you’ll be full of joy in a relationship.

If you are bitter single, you’ll be bitter in a relationship.

If you live each day to the fullest single, you’ll enjoy each day to the fullest in a relationship.

If you live solely on your emotions when you’re single, you’ll do the same in your relationship.

I think that the problem for a lot of women (and men too) is that we weren’t taught about who we are in God. We are given a template and expected to fit into that template. And God is sitting there wondering where the leaders got the template, because it was NOT from Him.

Not everyone is going to meet their spouse in high school or college. Not everyone will be married by 22 and having their first baby by 25. There are a lot of people who aren’t even ready to be in a relationship or get married in their 20s. Everyone has a calling, but not everyone is called to be a pastor or to marry a pastor.

God created a good plan for us, but it isn’t necessarily like the plans of those around us. If you really want to live out God’s will (which simply means His heart’s desire and wish for your life) then you need to realize that you are NOT your sister, brother, cousin, friend, pastor, parent or anyone else. You are YOU. And God loves YOU. He knit YOU together in your mother’s womb. (Psalm 139) He made YOU unique. That means that He also made your plan to uniquely fit YOU.

One of the most freeing things I’ve experienced was to realize that I wasn’t ever going to be like my sisters or my friends, I could only be me. While I was really mad about it at the time, it freed me. I like that I’m kind of a weirdo. I like that I need alone time to recharge. I like that I scrapbook my stamp collection. I like that my bathroom is the BRIGHTEST yellow you’ve ever seen. (My mom actually laughed about the color of my bathroom this past weekend). I like that I have an insanely vivid imagination. I like that I love Superman and honestly want to marry Clark Kent. I like that I watch Disney princess, musicals, Star Wars, and Jane Austen movies. I love that I talk to God all day long and dance around my house when I worship Him. I like that I drink chocolate milk from the container. I like that I have Doris Day on my iPod. I like that I am 7 on the inside, look 25 on the outside and am actually 38. I like that I mix my cake and ice cream together at birthday parties. I like who I am. I’m still working on the full on loving the way I look, but I’m speaking kindly to myself now. So I consider that to be progress.

I was a wreck at 21. I was under construction at 25, 30 and even now at 38. I have improved and I am not who I was then. I have allowed God to heal me. I’ve allowed God’s word to transform my thinking. I’ve allowed Him to love me and call me His beloved Jillian. I never believed He could love me before, so this is new. And I like it! I love that God has been patient with me, because I am a very slow changer. I like change, but I change sloooow. I receive the word immediately, but the implementation… well… it’s like Michigan road construction slow.

I said all that to say that I’m very grateful that God knew better than to send me my husband before I was ready. I appreciate that He and I dealt with the issues so I didn’t end up with a mess of a marriage or end up divorced. I’m grateful that He not only gave me a promise to hold on to, but He showed me why waiting for that promise was worth it. He showed me why it’s worth it even while I’m still waiting. He’s cool that God!

We have the right to choose to marry anyone who wants to marry us. God gives us that choice. I could have been married before now, but I chose to wait. For me, the only choice is to wait for a mature man of God who fits perfectly into the relationship I have with God. I will not marry anyone who distracts me from God. My heart’s desire is for a man who will cover me and pray for me to have an even better relationship with God and likes the little weirdo I am. If that means I wait 10 more years (on top of the 10 years that have already passed since I’ve gotten my promise that I will be married), then I will enjoy my life right where I am for those 10 years.

You ARE going to wait my friends. But it is your choice what you do with the time you are waiting. So you can choose to focus on finding a spouse and waste valuable life time. Or you can choose to enjoy the time.

So why not use this time that you have to cultivate a relationship with God? Why not use the time to develop your talents and deal with your issues? Why not enjoy every day? Trust me when I say, life is wayyyy more fun when you’re focused on God. God’s a blast people. Seriously.

Note to God: You and I both know I’m ready, so please don’t make me wait 10 more years. But if You need those years, that’s okay too. I love You either way.

Identity Rant

As a teen and young adult I got really tired of the church telling me to do something with the “because I said so” and the “be good” reasoning. I still battle that desire to live inside the rule box.

I’m going to rant now- How about telling me the whole truth? The truth is that God actually set up marriage as a covering and a protection for women. Instead of trying to scare me with STDs and pregnancy! How about teaching me who I am in God? How about making me confident to know that I am worth marrying? How about telling me that any guy who would sleep with me outside of that covenant doesn’t actually respect me at all, no matter what he says? How about teaching guys HOW to respect women? How about teaching them how to be real men instead of guys, punks and dudes? How about teaching them who they are in God too?

Rant over. Rational blog to follow in 3, 2, 1….

There is a rampant identity crisis in this world. I’m not the only one who struggled with identity. And honestly, I don’t blame my parents or the churches I went to for my lack of identity. It’s not their fault, because they did not know what they were doing. They did their best with what they had and they loved me the best way they knew how. I had some very wonderful people in my world, truly. And I’m grateful.

But the fact remains that the world at large lies to kids. They do one of three things: The world scares the crap out of them and scars them for life, traps them in a ruled filled box, or tells them to do whatever they want. Not one of those things are actually Biblical, my friends!

Moses spent a lot of time telling the Children of Israel the importance of passing on what they learned about God and from God to their children. But they didn’t do it. So after Joshua died, the children of Israel went through a crazy cycle (Read Judges) of doing whatever they wanted, then crying out to God. God would send a deliverer, and then they’d stick with God for a generation. Then they’d start the cycle all over again.

Proverbs 22:6 says: “Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Training up doesn’t must mean to tell them do this and don’t do that! It means we need to show them how to make good decisions and why it matters. Most importantly though, we NEED to know who we are in God and we NEED to teach the next generation who they are in God. It is ESSENTIAL that they know because how you see yourself colors every decision you make (and the ones we don’t). Your identity feeds your perspective.

Before I really understood how much God adored me, I was willing to take what I could get. I coasted along living on crumbs. I don’t do that anymore, because I am the daughter of the Most High God. He has a good plan for me and I expect Him to do good things for me. I expect that when I screw up that He will it around for my good. Because that’s who He is and what He does! He’s a good God who restores and reconciles and regenerates and resurrects! And He is absolutely in love with us! With me! With you!

Here’s an intro to your identity in Christ:

Ladies, you are the representation of the beauty of God. You are the daughter of the most high. Zephaniah 3 says that God sings over you with joy. On the cross, you were the joy set before Jesus that made all that suffering WORTH IT! You are adored! So don’t settle for anything less than full respect and love.

Gentlemen, you are the representation of the warrior side of God. Sorry to tell you but having sex does not make you a man. Sorry. But it doesn’t. What makes you a man is you being responsible and respectful. Genesis 1 tells you that you are made in the image and likeness of God. You were created first to be a leader, a guardian and protector. It also means you have the power to create and sow good things! That’s who you were made to be. Don’t settle for being an immature boy or a guy who plays around, be a man.

Hope in God

Today’s Deep Thought: When your hope is based on God’s promises, you can be assured that you will not be disappointed because not a single one of God’s promises will fail!

The last thing Joshua said to the Israelites was, “Deep in your hearts you know that every promise of the LORD your God has come true. Not a single one has failed!” Joshua 23:14 NLT

Hebrews tells us: “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” Hebrews 11:1 NLT

Paul said: “And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.” Romans 5:5

Hope=A joyful and confident expectation of good.

Faith=Being convinced (absolutely persuaded) that God is who He says He is and, therefore, will do what He says He will do. Also known as trust, belief.

Even if you don’t see how God is going to do it, God sees the beginning and the end.

Even if you can’t wrap your mind around it or begin to understand it, God knows all things.

Even if you have no money, God is your provision.

Even if you’ve been waiting sooooo long, don’t give up. Those who persevere receive what they were promised.

Even if it looks impossible, God still does miracles every day. He has limitless resources. LIMITLESS! And He’s got more planned for you than you can possibly imagine. Imagine that!

Even if you are the least likely, ESPECIALLY if you are the least likely candidate, God loves using those people! (David for instance. Or Mary. Or Galilean fishermen and tax collectors working for the Romans. The list goes on and on).

When God promises something, He delivers. So, stand on His word! Speak the scripture out loud! Remind God of His promises.

Faith praises God NOW for things that have been promised but have not yet arrived. We praise NOW because we know that God ALWAYS keeps His Word. Always.